It seems that around ten weeks of non-stop, high octane touristing is about as much as we can manage, so we headed to the Southern Thai island of Phuket with the intention of doing as little as possible, and preparing ourselves inwardly for the return home.

Our lack of planning counted against us, as we ended up taking an early Thai Airways flight from Chiang Mai to Bangkok, then hanging around the airport for a couple of hours to take Bangkok Airways down to Phuket. Bangkok Airways are a relaxed bunch, and our flight was delayed for a little over an hour, thanks to a delay in tracking down a plane for us to use. We did get access to their lounge, though, with free snacks, drinks and internet access, so the time passed pretty quickly.

We should probably also have booked a transfer from Phuket airport to the hotel, as the beaches are a 45 minute drive away (we really didn’t research this bit at all well :-) ). A representative of the hotel was on hand to help us out, so a little while and 650 Baht later, we arrived at Phuket’s Holiday Inn Resort. We’ve spent enough nights in Holiday Inns on this trip, that we’re Gold Priority Club members, accumulating points for free nights later on. They must have us marked down as high rollers, as our check-in information was held in the VIP file, and we got personally escorted to our room, and presented with orchid garlands. Which was nice.

Class-consciousness is alive and well here, as the Holiday Inn complex comprises three parts, due to expansion combined with tsunami rebuilding. The main building is moderately high rise and has some nice amenities including a couple of bars and restaurants, together with a pool that leads down to the road separating all the hotels and such from the beach. Residents of the new ‘Busakorn‘ wing (that’s us) get access to all of that, plus our own ’special’ pool (featuring ‘cute’, according to Dawn, spouting elephant statues), bar, restaurant and lobby/entertainment area that links to our suite-like rooms. The rooms are super-spacious and have a balcony, seating area, desk, dresser and so on. The hoi-polloi from the main wing aren’t allowed in to clutter up the place. Likewise, we’re not allowed into the ‘Busakorn Suites’ area, where the top-end rooms are, with their own exclusive pool and other hidden delights. We might have to sneak in at some point, just to see what’s there! :-)

Despite the newness of the place, internet access is limited here, too, with a pay-as-you-go dial-up service available in the rooms, or a WiFi broadband in the lobby area at 100 Baht (about $3) an hour. The reading room is generally home to a small cluster of folks hunched over laptops, clattering away at keyboards!

Apart from that inconvenience, it’s all very nice, and a great oasis to relax in before facing the pressures of home. Once outside the gates, though, Phuket is all rather different, and a bit disappointing. [18 Jan edit: That was unfair, as Jamie points out in his comment. Patong was really disappointing, the rest of Phuket was much nicer. The rest of this paragraph refers only to the tourist haven of Patong. For more information on Phuket and recommendations for accommodation, sightseeing and dining, take a look at Jamie's excellent Blog at http://jamie-monk.blogspot.com] There doesn’t seem to be a significant tourist threat here, but each gate is manned by a security guard, and incoming vehicles are given a mirror-under-the-car check. All the lifts and lobby areas have guards, too, but we think that’s more to keep the packs of local hawkers out. They’re everywhere, and you can’t walk more than a couple of paces before being offered a taxi, tuk-tuk (three-wheeled motorised death-trap), made-to-measure suit, massage or inspection of a souvenir stall. The most common way to suck people in is a friendly greeting, a ‘where are you from’, and/or an outstretched hand to shake. Stop for any one of these, and it’s hard to get going again without seeming rude, which is the whole point, of course. We’ve settled on the marginally rude approach of striding by with our ‘game faces’ on, ignoring outstretched hands, and responding with a smile and a shake of the head to everything else.

Even the Europeans are at it, riding around on motorbikes, offering competitions and giveaways, the prizes of which appear to be timeshare-related. Between them and the trucks driving by loudly advertising discos, radio stations and Thai Boxing (“Tonight! Tonight! Tonight!…”) it’s pretty tiring just walking over to the beach!